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this is what my day has come to

January 23, 2013

I woke up this morning and almost immediately wanted to go back to bed.  Even though I wasn’t tired, I probably should have followed my instincts and just let this day pass me by.

I felt blah from the moment I opened my eyes.  I could feel a depression creeping in, but none-the-less, I crawled out of bed and tried to move forward and imagine a better day for myself.  Unfortunately, some days the universe just conspires against you.

So far it has been a complete waste of a day and I don’t see it improving.  I have no energy, no inspiration, no desire to do anything at all, and yet I am simultaneously bored to tears.

Before I started writing this post I was combing the knots out of my hair with my fingers and counting all the split ends.

I’ve attempted to take a few actions to lift myself out of this mood, but nothing has worked and now I am out of ideas.  That’s alright though as I no longer have any urge to try.  I am sinking into it and am simply left waiting for this day to come to an end; hoping that I slap out of it with the start of new day.  Afterall there’s nothing like beginning the day with a nice red hand print across your cheek.

I am really in no mood for another depressive episode (and no, I am never in the mood for this, but I’m already down so if you could just let this one go, I would really appreciate it).

I just had a moment of excitement as I realized I haven’t given one of my best pick me ups a try, but came crashing down a nano second later as I realized I don’t have the ingredients for a chocolate martini.

Oh well, back to counting split ends.  I guess if I try to look on the bright side, I do have a lot of hair so it should keep my occupied for a while.

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