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I can’t quite seem to put my finger on why holiday invites have stopped coming my way, why I am suddenly getting so many cancellations from friends or why even my family seems to be squirming about our upcoming festivities.

Maybe I shouldn’t have mentioned some of the crafty creative gifts I plan on giving out this year. I bet my friends are simply concerned that they won’t be able to come up with anything even remotely as awesome and so they are cancelling out of embarrassment.

 

crafting with cat hair

I’m not so sure ‘with’ is the correct word. Pretty sure it should read “Cute Handicrafts to Make FROM your cat – but just the hair, not like its internal organs or anything. Please don’t dismember your cats”.

 

I definitely don’t want friends and family to feel down on themselves for not finding this wonderful inspiring book first.  They really shouldn’t feel bad or compare themselves, and they should know that such amazing creativity often comes from having a limited budget and so you make the best of what you have and what I have is cats.

If they really want to compete, they can always give away all their money (like maybe to me so I can buy presents instead) and then they will start to come up with ingenious gift giving ideas and they can show me up. Everyone wins.

Though now that I think about it, I bet they are simply upset with me for spoiling the surprise.  I’ve accidentally ruined the wonder that comes with gifts and I suspect if I apologize all the invites will start pouring in again and my family will stop suggesting I spend this year entirely with my in-laws.

And since I have already proven how magnificent I am at apologizing, I believe I’ll have this mishap cleared up in no time.

I have a question.

I have been spending a bit of time listening to talks of breast health/cancer/prevention/etc, that all focus on a more natural perspective – prevention and care, not simply the more invasive treat the symptoms kind of approach.

Now, no matter what your personal views on the subject may be, I am wondering, is it alright to stand at your front window, lift your shirt (while bra-less) and shout as loud as you possibly can “I love my breasts!”?

I’m hoping my neighbours think so.  Or that the snow is falling so thick today that sound and sight are not capable of penetrating through it.

Either way, what’s done is done.

ps – for anyone interested, the talks I have been listening to are from Rethink Pink and are well worth the time http://www.wishsummit.com/pinkribbon 

Reduce, Reuse, Recycle. Absolutely.

That’s why I am recycling a tweet I shared yesterday.

xander always really wanted to be a blonde

xander always really wanted to be a blonde

Plus, as you can see, I am way into finding perfectly reasonable and acceptable uses for things that would otherwise be thrown away (such as hair from another cat – just one example that randomly comes to mind). That’s like, super sustainable living.

I may have missed the reduction part of the equation which, I know, is supposed to be the first and most important step, but seriously, asking me to reduce my cats just seems cruel.  I can’t even believe you would suggest such a thing!  And no, I have no idea what that means, but I am sure it’s some kind of PETA violation.

Not cool people.  Not cool.

Some days I revel in my idiocy, some days I just shake my head, roll my eyes, and pretend I am someone else.

Someone who has their life together.

I hear these people exist.

You know the sort; people who can make a pot of tea and actually remember that they did so.

Clearly, my idea of someone who has their life together is rather grand and not achievable for all, but I have high hopes for myself.  And please don’t tell me that there is something further I can strive for.  I’m fragile, and keeping my delusions intact is paramount to my daily existence.

One stage at a time people.

I have hopes however, which is why I was attempting to take some time to enjoy a nice pot of blooming tea while listening to some metaphysical well-being interview thingy.  I believe that’s the technical term.

So I listened while I did dishes and waited for the water to boil; while I waited for the tea to brew; while I replied to emails and bookmarked websites for further reading – all while still waiting for my tea to brew; while I sorted through papers and eventually made my way back to the kitchen to put items in the recycling bin which was when I discovered I’d forgotten about my brewing tea and then I decided to start this post all while still listening to the uplifting recording.

I remember something about rings and something about flushing, which is just a little bit weird and I think maybe I’m glad I didn’t hear the rest of that bit, but I’m sure my unconscious mind must have taken in all the important parts right?

Spiritual enlightenment, health and well-being must be just around the corner.

I’m thinking I should write a book about how to achieve bliss through multi-tasking.  I mean, really, I have this covered.  It may take a little longer and you may always be drinking your tea at the wrong temperature or eating a lot of burned foods, but at least you can still watch tv, listen to podcasts, play solitaire or do any other number of activities simultaneously.  It will have to be sold as a print and audio book set, but it could work.

Sweet goddess, sometimes I make myself sad.

Not sad in a depressing, emo sorta way (at least not this time), but more of a my-life-is-quite-pathetic kinda way.

It’s shortly after seven on a saturday night and it’s just me and the cats as the boy is out.  I am so sleepy all I want to do is crawl into bed.  So I have to wonder, did I suddenly age forty years overnight?  I mean, WTF?

I am attempting to find ways to make my evening less desperate and more exciting, but I am not sure how to accomplish this with an empty wine cabinet.  Suggestions?

Keep in mind, I am tired (as stated above) and lazy (as stated in many previous postings) so leaving the house is not an option.

While on the subject of wine, I must celebrate my new best friend/pusher, Cam.  I have always enjoyed his company and thought very highly of him, but after a brief conversation we had the other night, I have come to realize that he is just the enabler I didn’t even know I was looking for.

His many suggestions for getting more wine into my life and providing sound reasons for doing so are truly inspiring.  He has even gone after the boy to be a better provider.

Cam, I bow (or curtsy if I’m in a girlie mood) to your superior mind and thank you for your assistance.

As for tonight, if I choose to spice up my evening in a more spirited way, it will have to be tequila shots.  It’s the only thing I have in the house. So now for the next big decision, right from the bottle or something a little more sophisticated and if so, which famous drinker shot glass shall I choose.  Narrowing it down to W B Yeats or Oscar Wilde, but as Yeats is more likely to lead me to a faerie world, I think he has the edge.

So in an attempt to make my life seem slightly less pitiful, I’m trading in tired, lonely and pathetic for tired, lonely, pathetic and drunk. Awareness is highly overrated.

Cheers!

I’m not much of a fan or celebrater of valentine’s day, but occasionally some love stories and marriage proposals  just capture my heart.

Happy Valentine’s Day!!

never too old for a tail

February 6, 2013

Occasionally I wonder if I will ever truly grow up.

I sometimes go on extra alert, waiting (without anticipation) to see if that day will come; just out of curiosity.

I hope it never happens.  The day I wake up and don’t want to put on a pair of wings and frolic about the house had best be because that’s the day I put on a tail and find a water source.

Which brings me to my latest goal, obsession, desire, etc.  Well, I say latest, but it’s not exactly a new area for me, it’s simply new in deciding that I should actively pursue becoming a mermaid.

Of course, as always, I am excellent in the researching and planning stages, but the moment it comes to putting ideas into action, I tend to falter.  Also, I’m lucky if I can hold my breath for ten seconds, and fish sometimes freak me out.  I’m a little afraid of sharks as well… and water snakes… and alligators… and growing extra limbs or other weird things from polluted waters.

To be fair, given that I live in Ontario, only a few of these are of real concern at the moment.  Imagined concern is entirely different, but also very real for me as I can turn a guppy into a razor toothed menace complete with bulging shifty eyes and scary pointing down in the middle eyebrows (just so you know he’s really evil and angry) capable of leaping out of an aquarium and flying (that’s right, I said flying) throughout the house to find and devour me.

All I am saying is that the journey to becoming a mermaid may not be as simple as wearing a tail.

No worries though, I won’t be trading in my wings for a monofin.  I can only imagine how much you were concerned by this.

I love my airy faerie world, but I have always been a water being and outside of laying in puddles during rainstorms I have been away from this element for too long.  I am never more myself than when I am gliding through water.

I leave you with one of my most favourite mermaids.  The lovely Hannah Fraser.

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